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Never Hurt a Rich Man's Feelings

by Vagabond Villain

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1.
Deontological Categorical Imperative Test the Contradiction in Conception Test the Contradiction in the Will What's my motivation here? We can lie to save lives
2.
I am a victim of mass karma Am I good enough to survive a plane crash? You took my money to pay for your wars We turn a blind eye to keep our lifestyles Envy and greed will sow the seed
3.
We will first meet at a public distance We will connect at a social distance We'll become friends at a personal distance We'll be as one at an intimate distance
4.
Wu Who? 03:51
I can't wait to get my new toy From the hands of a foreign boy Even though I don't know Wen She'll be there to make toys again Move along Look away Benefit From low pay
5.
I would not like better healthcare I would not like social welfare I would not like more paid time off I will not think before I scoff I am Uncle Sam I Am Check out my new tax program I would not, could not take a bus Mass transit is ridiculous I would not, could not speak Spanish I'm scared my culture would vanish I am Uncle Sam I Am And I could not give a damn I cannot get through my thick head That our kids need better sex ed And when it's time to raise our sons They'll be exposed to tons of guns I am Uncle Sam I Am Check out my new space program
6.
Rapporters 04:10
Pop the newsfeed filter bubble Leave behind the echo chamber What is fact and what is truth? It's OK to get things wrong Democracy requires citizens to see things from another’s point of view Democracy requires a reliance on shared facts My newsfeed shows my truth We're getting less exposure to conflicting viewpoints
7.
Never smoke ** It will ** your life Never take ** It will only make strife Never shoot ** Or you'll end up dead Never drop ** Or you'll lose your head Never snort ** It will ** your brain Never sniff ** It will only cause pain Never try ** Or you'll end up alone Never buy ** Or your money will be blown Never lick ** It's not good for you Never drink ** It's the worst thing you could do Never slam ** Or you'll feel run down Never spike ** Or you'll permanently frown Never mix ** with **, **, or ** Never put ** or ** in your ** Never do ** while doing ** Never shove ** up your ** or your **
8.
Open Sores 03:49
Camp Delta Standard Operating Procedures Keep some prisoners from Red Cross inspectors Classify civilian kills as insurgent kills We’ll continue saying the bombs are ours, not yours Dead bastards! Light 'em up! Keep shooting, keep shooting! Collateral Murder
9.
Listen to the little voice in your head, Sylvia... Who's Bill? Bill Clinton? The one who was found to be innocent in the Lewinski scandal? Is it the high BILL the grieving will have to pay? No. I think it's another Bill. Bill Bradley. He became the president of the United States in 2000. Just as you predicted...but no one seems to remember... It's a constant 78 degrees here in Heaven, so grab on to those spirit guides and make your way to the Hall of Wisdom where you can sit, eat popcorn, and enjoy a thrilling 3D romp through your past lives all over again! In the mood for a little gossip? No problem! Just head on down to the Hall of Records where you can search through the lives of anyone who has ever lived! I have a message for the people, Sylvia... First of all, happy 30th birthday to everyone in Heaven... And, not to mention those of you still on Earth... I'll be preying on...I mean...for you. Anyway...uhhh...let us all tip our hats to those brave miners from West Virginia who are now also celebrating their 30th birthdays in a hole...uhhh...holy place. You guys sure did give us quite a scare...coming out alive and then being dead all along...Either way, it doesn't really matter. Curve balls can't hurt that 87% batting average, can it? Can I get an amen here, people? Ignorant Noory...Ignoring mistakes. Oh well...Those pathetic freaks will believe anything he says. Wait...don't say that out loud.

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released August 10, 2019

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